Wednesday May 7 2008

All people from Sublette Co. in Chemo Yesterday

Photo by Judi

Well shoot! I had a draft of Today's Blog all ready to finish up and hit "Publish", and the power surged and lost it yesterday afternoon. All the things from the day before I didn't have room or time for, or that would have made Tuesday's blog so long you would have had to read it in chapters. Some of it was cut and paste from somewhere else, some events that had happened on Monday. So this one might not get everything in that I wanted. I can't remember what I did 10 minutes ago which is the main purpose for this journal, let alone the next day. But .... Oh, Well. I'll try it again.

Judi had heard that Bud was back in the hospital, and Lois hadn't left his side for the last 12 days. Judi went and found them and visited in their room for a while. I thought they were still in New Mexico snowbirding. While they were down there he got shingles on his head and neck and it got infected with staph. He has had an awful time. They started driving home from N.M. when he began to feel bad and right into the Jackson Hospital. They've had way more than their share of medical troubles lately. Judi asked Lois what she was doing for clean underwear, and Lois said a very nice man friend they have went through her drawers at home and brought her up what she needed. Since I couldn't get unhooked in chemo to go over to see them, Lois came and said hi and visited for a few minutes.

On the way home coming through the canyons, hills and curves we kept hearing a sound like the tires squealing a little bit, finally I asked Judi if she could hear it and she said yes, and maybe had heard something on the way up too. It just did it intermittently. I was getting worried, still thinking about pulling Joe out of the snow and maybe something wrong with the transmission or maybe a low tire ..... who knows what. They Judi said it sounded like a cat squalling, and I really started worrying that maybe since I'd left the car in the yard the night before that one of the cats was stuck under the car somewhere. FINALLY I caught the sound just right and it was coming from the pump around my neck!! It sounds like when a tape recorder rewinds, maybe for a second or two. Whew, glad no cats are hurt. Another thing we had to laugh about. How silly are we?

Kay called me this morning to see if I was going to the workshop. She left about noon today. I said no I couldn't go and am pretty sorry to miss the trip. She said it was raining at her house. It was sunny here but since then has become overcast off and one with a few sprinkles. I wish we would get a nice soaking rain. Actually it would be nice if it would rain hard enough to clean the dirt off the windows.

Today I have to go in to the Pinedale clinic about 4:30 and get the pump taken off. They will flush it with heparin (No they never get their heparin from China, in case you heard about that being recalled.) and I'll be done with it until next time. I haven't been able to shower, just sponge bath, so that will feel good to get clean again. We also need to get gas in the car, and hope maybe to go through the car wash. I need just a few more things from the grocery store. Betty and Nancy will be here on Sunday, and I probably won't be back to town before then so will get stocked up for that. So after those errands we are going to Gina and Bob's for dinner tonight. That will be a really nice thing to see them again and catch up with what's been going on in their lives.

Debbie is having Tayler's swim team over for a dinner tomorrow, BBQ chicken and lots of other stuff. Forty kids - wow! They have a nice back yard with a pool so it should be a nice party. Lots of work for Debbie.

My stomach is a little growly today but I'm feeling pretty good, especially if I'd remember to take my medicine. Guess I have to be feeling o.k. to keep forgetting it all the time. I'm always very late getting it down any more. The time doesn't make a lot of difference I guess, if I eventually get it taken. Slept last night about 12 hours. The pump isn't bothering me at all.

Tuesday May 6 2008

How About THAT Cleavage?

Yesterday went to my chemo appointment. Left here at 7, went to recycling, picked up Judi about 8 at the Rendezvous Pointe. We took the pants that didn't fit to the UPS shipping place to be returned. Then tried to run through the carwash, but there was a line so we didn't do that. The back window was so dirty we could hardly see through it. Judi cleaned it off later this afternoon while she was waiting, and what a difference! On through Wyoming's Serengeti - we saw so much wildlife today, mostly deer and antelope everywhere, both coming and going. The Hoback River is flooding and muddy this time. The Snake is green and clear but much higher up the banks. Still plenty of snow up at Bondurant and through the mountains.

Got up to Jackson about 9:30 and the appointment wasn't until 11:30 so had time to go take back more clothes that didn't fit to Corral West, then went to Eddie Bauer but it wasn't open for a few more minutes so we went in a restaurant next door and had coffee and toast and used their restroom. That hit the spot. Back to Eddie Bauer where I exchanged the skirt I bought to wear to Tayler's graduation for a SMALLER size. It had gone on sale so I got two more pretty t-shirts for just a few $$ more. That was a nice surprise because I nearly mailed the skirt back too and would have just got the refund. Then we had nearly another hour so went to shop in KMart. I got lots that was on my list there, mainly some new glasses for the kitchen, bath rugs and a set of sage color bath towels. I will discard an old tattered set of towels, and use the old rugs for dog and cat beds discarding the oldest of those.

Over to the hospital and they were very busy today. Most all of the people there were from Sublette County. They are getting a shuttle bus going that will run on Tuesdays from Pinedale to the hospital in Jackson for people with appointments. I for one will probably use it. I'm sure a lot of people will say "wrong day for me" or "don't want to wait that long". Whatever. I just hope they might give you a chance to go get prescriptions or things like that too, maybe even shop if it fit in with the schedule.

Judi took pictures of all of us for Kickin' Cancer which is a charity to help people just in Sublette County. They are backing the shuttle bus I understand. I was going to put one of those pictures on the blog too, but couldn't get it to save or copy so far. The lady who started that very successful Kickin' Cancer program when she got cancer was there and I was glad to meet her. They have a big auction and party that's coming up soon. (I'm donating a painting.) A nurse with breast cancer who has worked at the Pinedale Cinic was also there. All with their friends or husbands. The youngest gal there just had a baby and her fallopian tube cancer was found when they did the sonogram. The baby girl is 10 weeks old now. She said it was the baby that saved her life, by getting the sonogram.

Since they were busy I was slow getting started although they got the IV in the port and got the blood for the white platelet count right away. We ordered lunch which was good as ever. Judi shared her french fries with me as I didn't think to order them separately from my patty melt. She was so good to me all day, I'm thankful to her for taking such good care of me, getting me toast, putting my shoes on and off, taking notes, sharing french fries and cheesecake, washing the back window. And WAITING!

O.K. here's the scoop on the new chemo cycle. I do NOT go every week now, but every two weeks for two months (4 treatments) and then have CT scans and doctor appointment again. That is nice so with the extra time off, I may be able to get a few trips and traveling in this summer. That is 12 days off between each treatment. I do wear the pump for two days after every treatment.

Doctor Ward and Dr. Kim Jones, Oncologists, went over what Dr. Jones has been studying about my pathology and what Dr. Ward is seeing with the scans and came up with this new regime. It's not what Dr. Ward told me about two weeks ago. It's totally different, so toss that old info. This is the one that's FULL FURY. I am having Leucovorin (Wellcovorin) - kills cancer cells; Fluorouracil (Adrucil) called 5-FU - (someone with a sense of humor??) kills cancer cells; Irinotecan (Camptosar) - kills cancer cells; Bevacizumab - kills cancer cells - this one stops circulation to the tumors. They don't all drip at once, but two in succession ?? Anyway we waited for two drips one after another. Before that a few other small things drip in to enhance the treatment or protect and help you have fewer side effects, as well as a big bag of saline solution that starts as soon as I sit down.

I was in the chair for six and a half hours. They got me so full of fluid I was hauling that IV stand to the bathroom about 4 times. Between all of the different chemos, there are bunches of possible side effects, but the worst of it sounds like diarrhea and increased chance of infection, possibility of bleeding, nausea, more. I probably will loose my hair this time. I got Imodium to take for the diarrhea. So then at the end of the drips Judy hooked me up to a pump and it continues to give medicine through the port for two more days. I wear the box for two days (see the photo at the top - it took about 15 photos to get a decent one.) and will go to the Pinedale Clinic about 5:30 Wednesday to have them take it off. I'm not sure what exactly is in the pump, didn't ask that. Then take the pump back to Oncology next time to be used again. Wearing the pump has been o.k. so far and I slept fine with it just laying beside me.

It was a very long day, with shopping and 6 hours driving added on. We stopped at Taco Bell for very fast food since it was getting late. After I let Judi off back at Rendezvous Pointe, I got all the things on my grocery list. It wasn't that much, but back tracking in the store made it longer. I only put away the cold stuff last night and the rest this morning. I am still feeling fairly good, but pretty tired. Just a little nauseous or a little feeling of stomach discomfort so far. Judy Basye will call me to get the list of medications all the doctors have prescribed since the surgery, mainly for nausea and pain so they know what to ask for in prescriptions. And she will call the Pinedale Clinic and set up a time to get the pump removed and let me know - that's tomorrow. I asked Judy B. lots of questions this time, and got good answers. It's never going to be cured. I asked her if this treatment was likely or possible to shrink the tumors in the liver. Now I'm not sure the exact word she used, but she said something like "Absolutely!" So am still feeling optimistic that this may give me time, maybe a lot of time..... maybe not.

That's about it for now.

Monday May 5 2008

Lynn in the Hoback Canyon

Embracing Life and the Universe

Photo Taken by Judi

Just a note, although I sort of still feel awake enough to go ahead and write, I'll just tell you that I'm back home and feeling good so far. A few quick thoughts - I knew it would be a long day but not this long. Left at 7 a.m. and have just gotten home, sitting down at almost 10:30. We/I drove 6 hours and sat in the chair at oncology for 6 hours and did all the rest of the things we did in the short time left. Tomorrow some time I'll write to give you the information and details of what happened today. I imagine I might sleep in late. One thing I just can never believe is how much fun I have going along with Judi or another sweet friend for the day. They must think we are cuckoo with all the laughing and giggling while I sit in the chair.

Just throw away everything "we" were already told about this new chemo cycle because it is very different than I was told at the Dr. Appointment. The two top oncologists had their conference together on me, and the Plan B is not going to happen. This one is the Full Fury they spoke of. Definition: Chemocycle - something I'm taking a tumultuous ride on - Oh, I have been up too long. Maybe it will take me soaring like the boys riding their bikes in front of the setting sun and the rising moon in E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial with their precious cargo in the handlebar basket.

Nube has been having adventures of her own ! ! See http://www.horseback41.blogspot.com/ .

Sunday May 4 2008

Stuck

This morning Joe woke me up saying I had to come and pull him out of a snowdrift. None of it made sense to anything I could think of. What snowdrift? Where? The only ones we have now are in the corral - how did he get stuck in the corral? What had gotten stuck? Red truck/ Yellow truck? The tractor he's been working on? He hadn't even told me he was going anywhere as usual. O.k. I put on some clothes and boots and he got the SUV out. And took him over to where he had the yellow Chevy stuck on Norm's road where there was a small drift left in a gully. The drift wasn't deep, but the snow had no traction I guess and the truck was just spinning out. There a small hill down both sides into the drift and he wanted me to pull him backwards up the hill. I wanted to get turned around and pull him with me going forward but had to do it his way. It didn't take much to hook up the chain and give him a pull out. Put the SUV in 4WD low range, and in reverse. My tires spun enough to smell like they were burning (which I hoped wasn't actually the transmission) so gave it another try and out he came.

Norm called last night and said he had turned our irrigation water on yesterday. So Joe was going over to our head gate beyond Norm's place on the hill to get it set. I was still sound asleep when he left. He had to walk home about a mile. That's the way the day started.

Yesterday I got quite a few more kitchen shelves cleaned including the big pantry. It feels good to be doing that - to feel ambitious enough to do it. I was tired last night though. I still hope I might get a lady to come and clean and do the heavy duty things. I found an old style glass coke bottle, full, on the back of one shelf that is a 1993 commemorative of the Colorado Rockies opening season. A coke truck crashed and someone picked some of the bottles up and gave me this one. I googled it and it looks like it's worth about $5.

Went to bed after dinner for a several hour nap and then got up and transcribed more letters from Nancy into the computer. One of her letters reminded me that bay mare Marge died when the Cannedy's bought the lodge, and they were going to make a rug out of her. (I talked them out of that.) Also that they were trapping all the beavers out of the lake and anywhere else nearby. Ten of the horses died (or disappeared) in the year the Cannedy's had the Lodge until we took it back, the worst among so many other bad things. Brings up sad and disgusting feelings.

Yesterday watched the Kentucky Derby and I HATE it when the horses are hurt, they are only babies. It's just not right to use them that way.

Also yesterday I got E.T. recorded on the DVR and am watching it this morning. Haven't watched it for years. Good movie. And they are also saying daddy longlegs spiders are quite venemous, but their fangs are too small to bite us. I always thought they were benign, so learn something new every day.

Tomorrow Judi and I will go to Jackson for the appointment to start the new chemo treatments. I'll let you know how it goes.

The poem below was on my email this morning so thought I'd share it. It came on The Writer's Almanac. Pretty funny.

Poem: "Posthumous" by Jean Nordhaus,

from Innocence. © Ohio State University Press, 2006.

.

Would it surprise you to learn

that years beyond your longest winter

you still get letters from your bank, your old

philanthropies, cold flakes drifting

through the mail-slot with your name?

Though it's been a long time since your face

interrupted the light in my door-frame,

and the last tremblings of your voice

have drained from my telephone wire,

from the lists of the likely, your name

is not missing. It circles in the shadow-world

of the machines, a wind-blown ghost. For generosity

will be exalted, and good credit

outlasts death. Caribbean cruises, recipes,

low-interest loans. For you who asked

so much of life, who lived acutely

even in duress, the brimming world

awaits your signature. Cancer and heart disease

are still counting on you for a cure.

B'nai Brith numbers you among the blessed.

They miss you. They want you back.

Saturday May 3 2008

Jack Rabbit In The Yard

.

Lynn and Ruth

Joe took our picture

Ruth came over for a while Friday. She lives about 60 miles away in Big Piney so it was a long drive for her. I really enjoyed seeing her again and getting to visit. We don't get together often enough and should do that more. I stuck some frozen lasagna in the oven for lunch with alpenglow salad and garlic toast. and veggies with ranch dip. Ruth brought homemade brownies were the best ones I have ever had in my life!! I had the two that were left after dinner...... yummy. We did a lot of talking and a little artwork. Finally the fall aspen scene is looking close to being finished. One of Ruth's dogs Ivy is Raven's mom. There were 13 puppies in the litter and she was born on New Year's Eve. So Raven was happy to see grandma Ruth.

Dang, It's just staying cold here most of the time, and the wind has been awful. The picture of the rabbit shows that the grass is turning green now. It really turned fast once it started a week or so ago and perhaps the grass will be good on the desert when the cattle are turned out after branding this year. The snow flurries we are having are helping the grass.

My sister Gloria in Green Valley near Tucson says they are having a measles epidemic there. We're trying to remember 60 years after the fact whether she ever had the measles when she was little, because she might want to get vaccinated if not. She can't remember having them. I can remember when I had them but now am not sure about her.

Excerpt of a paragraph from The Book (my memoirs) - about having The Measles:

We all had the measles on Wren Drive. I came down with them first. In those days during the convalescence you were supposed to stay in a dark room so you wouldn’t go blind. It was believed the measles weakened your eyes and any bright light was forbidden. So I stayed on a couch in the darkened den between the dining room and the kitchen where Mother could keep an eye on me. It was pretty boring to be so confined and it was hard to occupy my time once I got to feeling better. I kept asking, “Can I come out now?” Mother got magazines and gave me a pair of blunt scissors to cut the colored pictures out with. One of the magazines had pictures of Hawaiian cowboys and horses. I sat or lay in the den with the shades drawn and began a pleasurable habit I’ve had all my life, and another important part of being an artist. This simple event began the task of saving, collecting and filing “scrap” as a reference file for painting. I still enjoy cutting up magazines for that purpose today and have a huge reference file. Some of those photos I’ve saved since I was a kid. Another measles memory was a special treat my Mother made for me, amazing awesome purple pudding! She told me it was a secret recipe. I never had it before or since. I guess she just added food color to vanilla or butterscotch pudding, but I thought I was a pretty lucky kid.

A ship with about 150 tourists on a cruise sank off Antarctica after it hit some icebergs. I thought the story was pretty interesting. You can check it out here: http://www.nationalgeographic.com/adventure/news/explorer-sinks-antarctica.html

In early May, the International Space Station joins Jupiter and the stars of the Summer Triangle in a glittering pre-dawn sky. Later in the month, increasingly-frequent flybys shift to evening hours and the ISS will be crossing paths with Saturn, the Moon and Mars. Check our Simple Satellite Flybys tool to find out when to look: http://spaceweather.com/flybys .

Friday May 2 2008

"I Love You, Mom" or

"Got any biscuits??"

Yippee!! Ruth is coming over today so after she called I hurried to get the clutter out of the studio to give us room to work. Having company is a good thing to get inspired to clean things up. We'll do some artwork together and I'm going to stick a frozen lasagna in the oven so lunch will be easy. I'll write more about it later and maybe Joe will take a picture of us for tomorrow's blog.

Yesterday was another good day in terms of having good ambition and I got quite a bit done. I started cleaning the shelves and drawers in the kitchen and got two cabinets finished. The spice shelves was probably the worst mess. I decided not to put in new shelf paper and just to clean what is there. It looks just fine. These smaller things I can do. I also finally got the new filter into the air purifier.

Jim is flying for a German outfit who is doing a documentary about the oil/gas/Jonah Field, etc. They installed cameras in his airplane the other day then went out for dinner and Doc Tom joined them. Got 3 pair of pants in the mail yesterday and have tried them on. One needs to go back.

Being's I spend a bunch of time hanging out lately, I've been watching a lot of HGTV and Food Network. Mainly just have the TV on to drown out Joe's perpetual Fox News. I love to watch the Food Network Stars. It seems like cooking is certainly becoming more popular again, mainly due to them. My favorite is Alton Brown and his show is Good Eats. It's pure entertainment, with very good recipes thrown in. Paula Deen and Rachel Ray are a close second. Paula is truly unique and rather outrageous. Even at this late date, I'm having a Renaissance in my food spirit from watching them and its got me thinking "I can do that", even when just chopping an onion. I learned the son of one of our local artists and his wife (who works in our bank) is a star on Designed to Sell, my favorite HGTV show. I'm fascinated by all those home makeover shows.

It was on this day in 1611 that the first edition of the King James Bible was published in England.

Thursday May 1 2008

Dragging the Meadow with a Team of Horses
Right behind the Boulder Store

Don't have to buy gas and they start every time.

.

HAPPY MAY DAY
Spring is or should be here at last.....?????

Gardeners, remember that aphids are born pregnant.

.

Woke up to a new skiff of snow Wednesday morning. Then watched the squalls come and go up in the canyon and across the hills. The dreary clouds say "me! me!" and the sun says, "no, ME!

Yesterday Paige, one of "my"nurses from Oncology in Jackson, called with my appointment time and the plan for the new course of chemo treatment. The appointment is at 11:30 Monday May 5. So unless we change the day, it will be the 5th, 12th, 19th, and 26th. I will have four weeks of treatment and two weeks off. Get this..... The name of this chemo is Full Fury. The first time the IVs will drip for an hour and a half. The second week about an hour, then after that it will take about 30 minutes each time, which is what my last one took. Paige said it is more aggressive but shouldn't be too much worse than what I have already been taking. She told me that Monday I would come home with a pump attached to the port in my chest that would go for 48 more hours. I'm apprehensive about that. I expect Monday to be a long day. Diarrhea was mentioned. Guess the thing to remember is I can stop the treatment any time, or they can try something else.

During the two weeks off I still may be able to travel to Las Vegas to see Tayler graduate and visit family and friends there. Although not my favorite way to go, I could get on a plane and have them haul me around the airport on one of their golf carts so I don't get tired trying to walk/hurry/run. That it never occurred to me to do that until Beverly said they would, must mean I'm still in a strong/well frame of mind. Traveling is depending on how sick the new chemo makes me and other variables. There is also a pastel workshop in Idaho Falls that I would like to go to. It starts next week and will go from May 7 to 11th. I feel like I should be doing a few things besides just staying at home waiting for the next treatment especially since the weather is getting nicer. It really helps my mood. Friends Betty and Nancy will be here to visit from the 11th until the 16th or so, and we're sure looking forward to that. You guys be sure to bring your winter coats.

Sandra and Dave have the approval on the sale of their FBO (fixed base operator) at the Pinedale airport. Congratulations you guys, and best wishes on your new retirement. They have bought a cabin at South Pass and I know they will get rich panning for gold in the gulch.

Sandra called yesterday and we had a nice visit. I had to let her know that Joe isn't going to hay this year, so she needs to find another source for her horses' hay. Not many ranchers put up small bales any more either. They make giant bales now that weigh several tons and feed it with big feeders. So I hope she finds a good place to buy it. I also told Gina and Bob the other day.

Joe also said he isn't going to irrigate this spring. I'm glad he's not going to be on that machinery any more, so it's a sad mark in time and also a relief. He is going to let Doc come and hay our place and Doc will take the hay. I bet it doesn't take them more than two days with their big machinery.

Here's a lady who takes photos of the mountains and Wyoming land forms from her plane. Thought you might like to see them. http://www.wyomingaerophoto.com/